Peer Review

Whenever one of my papers has been peer reviewed, the comments and edits have been drastically different and varied from person to person. I believe that peer review is a great way for both the writer and the editor to learn. While the writer is getting great review done on his paper, the editor also gets to practice editing papers and finding mistakes. I always believed that you do not really understand something until you can teach it to someone else, so peer review is a good way for people to find out whether or not they really understand a concept. I also like peer review because it gives a personal touch from someone who has completely different opinions and ideas about your paper. You could have two different people review a paper and they could say completely opposite things about the same subject. However, this sometimes leads to problems since some people don’t really understand exactly what they are talking about, and can sometimes give bad advice to someone. There are minor things that are wrong with peer review, such as the bad advice or incorrect information, however for the most part I think it is a great way for people to learn and to better master their skill of writing.

As a writer I always love having people find grammatical errors in my paper. I am not the best proof reader and often miss many grammar mistakes. I also like when people say where they get confused about something in my paper or if I need to explain it in a better way. I like when they tell me when I need to clarify because sometimes I know what I want to say, but don’t get my point across. As a reviewer, I like when someone makes the topic and thesis of their paper very clear. I don’t like reading something and for half of the paper having to wonder what they are saying and what point they are trying to make. I also like when I am told to look for a specific aspect of the paper to improve. There are so many things you can change and improve in a paper, sometimes it is a daunting task to have to find just one thing at a time to improve. If there were stations where one person focused on one aspect of the paper then I think editing would be more effective.

I always like when at least two people look at my paper, that way I know when something is clearly confusing or when I need to change something. If it’s just one person, sometimes it makes me wonder whether or not I really need to change something. Ideally, as many people as possible would edit my papers so I get the most feedback I can and change what I think I need to.

I like to work on peer review for a longer time than most people, I feel like I usually am still working on someone’s paper when everyone else has finished, but maybe I am just a slow reader or editor. I like when the teacher selects the pairings because that way I just get a random person reading my paper instead of someone who I might already know what they will say.

Scene Depiction Plan of Action

I chose to do my project on the LGBT society. One of the RAs in my dorm is the leader or at least a leader of this group so I will easily be able to contact her about the society. There is also someone in the percussion studio who is an active member in that society, so I will also have easy access to a regular member of the society. I also know that they meet every once in a while for meetings, however I do not know the exact times of those meetings, but the RA in my dorm will be able to tell me.

I hope to better understand this group because I think they get a lot of bad rep and whether or not they deserve it, I really don't know anything about this group of people. I hope to just maybe get some facts out to the public and perhaps prove correct or incorrect the different stereotypes society has given this group of people.

Speech Review

After my speech I felt pretty confident. I had said everything thing that I needed to, I had spoken for enough time to match the requirements, I had spoken with a confident tone, and  I had stood with a good strong stance. Everything seemed to have gone well and of course I was relieved that I did not have to give a speech anymore to a room full of strangers. However, when I watched my video I was sorely disappointed as I realized everything I could have done better. While I did look at the audience for most of the presentation like I had planned and executed, I also looked back up at the screen multiple times unnecessarily because I had memorized all the points I wanted to make and the only thing on the board were pictures that, while relevant to the presentation,  did not contain any information that I did not already know. I also stood with a relaxed stance which I was aware of because I wanted to give out a relaxed feeling so that people did not feel uncomfortable with me and because I wanted to have more of a conversation with my audience instead of talking at them. I also was tired since it was an earlier class and my voice seemed tired since I was very sleepy. However, I see now how it could possibly come off as lazy or unprofessional. Finally, while I spoke with a confident and relaxed voice, it also lacked excitement and any kind of movement that would draw people into my speech. Like my stance, my tone could have given off a wrong sensation of laziness and unprofessionalism instead of relaxed and casual setting.

If I could go back and change my preparation and presentation, the biggest difference I would make is to tape myself before I actually presented. I would tape myself so that I could have seen all these mistakes before my presentation. I would have been able to change a lot and actually get what I was trying to say across the way I wanted it to. I also would have gotten more sleep the night before and woken up earlier to make sure I was awake for my speech so I could be active and involve my audience and make them interested to hear what I was saying. Although my speech had many mistakes, I was still pleased with my speech overall. Of course there were things to change, which is why I am glad I got to see my presentation, but I also was pleased that it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. A great learning experience, and a great project for this class.

Speech Outline

v Ethos

Ø  Physically:

§  Strong voice

§  Supported stance

§  No unintentional movement

·      Distracts from presentation

§  Create a calm general feeling

·      Calm voice

·      Relaxed but professional pose

§  Professional attire

·      Look nice

¨     It will gain respect and first impression

§  Weak Points

·      Annunciation and clarity

¨     Good breathes and talk slowly to emphasis words

Ø  Materially

§  Have a good couple of introduction sentences

·      Appear to be well prepared

·      Create a structure for the speech

v Pathos

Ø  Expressing emotions

§  Good emotions to set

·      Positive outlook, excitement

§  Bad emotions to set       

·      Scared, nervous, or depressed

§  Relationship to class

·      Class full of strangers

¨     Do not pound on your personal emotions early

Ø  They don’t know you and it will come off as weird

¨     Ease into the beginning of your relationship with class

Ø  Set your background so they know who they are listening to

§  Introduce personal experiences gradually to build relationship

v Logos

Ø  Introduction

§  Hook

·      “So much of what is best in us is bound up in our love of family, that it remains the measure of our stability because it measures our sense of loyalty. All other pacts of love or fear derive from it and are modeled upon it.” –Haniel Long

§  Thesis

·      My cultural identity is one of a leader in my family, career, and entertainment aspects of my life

Ø  Body Points

§  Family

·      Youngest child

¨     Gets along well with others

¨     Pampered

¨     Learn from siblings mistakes

¨     Driven to be unique and accomplished like my siblings

§  Career

·      Music Major

¨     Performer and Teacher

Ø  Personal drive to become better musician

§  Becoming a better musicianà being a better teacher

Ø  Driven by peers and higher morals to teach well

§  Inspiring the future of my career and of society

·      Teach music but also teach morals

¨     Story about choir director Mr. Ehrlich

Ø  VMEA Trip with Men’s Choir

§  Creation of family

§  Entertainment

·      Music and sports

¨     Singing

Ø  acoUstiKats

¨     Ultimate

Ø  Group of strong friends and teammates

§  Leader

·      Must get along well with others

·      Must know how to follow to lead

Ø  State Championship Trip

§  Creation of family of brothers

Ø  Conclusion

Street Players to Nerd Players

-->Street Players to Nerd Players

After reading Wesley Morris’ "Rise of the NBA Nerd: Basketball Style and Black Identity" many questions came to mind. However the one question that I had to focus on was why all these NBA stars were suddenly switching their wardrobe. To sum up the article, NBA stars such as Kevin Durant and LeBron James have been wearing clothes to press conferences that around a decade ago would have gotten them ridiculed by the black community. They have begun dressing in sweaters and cardigans and Durant even shows up wearing a backpack. This image of the ‘Black Nerd’ used to be the scapegoat and victim of many television shows and media, but today the super stars of the black community are seen dressing in the exact same way. Although many think this is odd, I think that it makes perfect sense! When anyone gets to a position of power and public exposure, such as NBA stars, they want either one of two things: To fit in, or to stand out. Some famous NBA stars will see press conferences as horrible events and will dread going to them. These are the same NBA stars who I believe try to go with the flow and not be noticed because they do not want national exposure. There is no better way to ‘hide in’ with a certain crowd by changing your physical appearance to match what is the social normal, which for now is the ‘street basketball player.’ On the opposite side of the spectrum you have the NBA stars who might even like the press conferences more than playing on the court. These NBA stars love the attention they get and want to have the cameras on them as much as possible. They also use their physical appearance to help get them attention. Nothing gets people’s attention more than someone who is visually different. That is why such NBA stars such as Kevin Durant changed their appearance to a more ‘nerdy’ style. Since being the ‘Black Nerd’ is going against the flow I believe he chose to dress like this so he can be an individual and gain attention. He wanted to create a name for himself and a physical appearance just as unique as his personality. I believe we are at a turning of the tides if you will in fashion and acceptable dress. The normal may be changing from the traditional street player to something more sophisticated or something completely original. I believe there is no real ‘normal’ in any aspect of clothing and dress in our society, at least American society. In fact the whole social norm perhaps may be individuality itself. Either way, NBA stars choose the way they dress very specifically to achieve what they want, and whether or not I have analyzed it correctly, I believe this transition from ‘street player’ to ‘nerd player’ is no coincidence. 

-Charlie McManus